About The Anonyman:
Profile Entries Tagboard Affiliates Thanks
Achtung!
Get Psyched!
Profile
Winston Zhang
28 March
NAPS
AMKSS
SP
Man Utd [Since '99]
Football
Video Games
Trumpet
ROCK
Music Junkie
Friday, April 10, 2009
00:09:00
So I just updated my Internet Explorer to version 8 and spent a good five minutes wondering whether I had just voluntarily fucked myself when I couldn't open IE (it kept closing due to some error or other). Figured out a way around it and now it's fine again though. Man that was close.
I've been spending the past couple of days with SK and/or Abby. Everytime I go out with them, I feel at peace with the world. They give me the right balance in life. It's like SK's one extreme (super nice guy to the rescue!), I'm the other (angry motherfucker) and Abby's the neutral one.
I know I can (or do) appear quite high-handed in this blog, at least as of late. That stems from me taking pride in my strengths, especially the ability to cut through the bullshit and to get straight to the heart of the matter. But I'd be the first to admit that I still have much to learn in life.
I'm too real for my own liking sometimes. Leaves me seeing misery almost everywhere (this doesn't mean I'M miserable, I just see misery), which in turn leaves me quite apathetic about most things, which then leads to me looking like someone who just doesn't give a shit about anything.
I like how I am; I would not trade being real for anything. But I am open to learning how to be less, well, 'angry' about things. Mind you, I rule out delusion and ignorance immediately. I wanna be more open-minded, not fucking delusional.
Maybe some things you just gotta choose though, I don't know. Maybe to be more forgiving I'd have to give up a significant amount of 'realism'. If that were the case I'd stick with being real, but I'd still like to absorb as much 'open-mindedness' as possible.
I need a day or two to myself to meditate a little. Not sit cross-legged on the floor and go 'ohm' kind of meditate lah, but just, you know, clear my mind.
Too few people catch up with themselves and re-evaluate their needs and wants. Leads to alot of frustration when they can't figure out why they're feeling so shitty. Alone-time is seriously underrated.
In other things, I'm gonna change the tone of my blog posts. It's slowly becoming something I cringe at when I read. I've always tried to avoid being something I hate, in whatever I say or do, and it's slowly becoming waaaay too pretentious for my liking.
I'll still complain about something or other now and then, but it'll be things that, although maybe appearing like I'm just being anal, are really scourges of this world once you put some thought to it. Not that I've been complaining irrationally, but it'll be more streamlined in the future.